I’m officially a previvor!

Previvor.
noun
1. A person who has survived their predisposition to cancer
2. Me!

(This post contains images of breasts post-surgery)  

It feels amazing to be writing this on the other side of my double mastectomy. The relief and pride that I feel for going through with it and slashing my risk from 87% to under 4% is incredible. Those feelings were intensified today when I received clear test results meaning no cancerous cells were found in my breast tissue. 

The last month has been a turbulent one. My younger sister underwent her mastectomy just two weeks before my surgery and unfortunately suffered complications. A blood clot meant a second emergency operation, the loss of her nipple and a ten day hospital stay. It was terrifying to witness so close to my own mastectomy and awful to see my sister in pain.

The two nights before my surgery I seriously contemplated not going through with it but instead running away and using my time off work to lie on a beach somewhere. I had to remind myself why I made the decision in the first place and force myself to be strong.

On the morning of my surgery the nerves and fear I expected were not there. I was resigned to what was happening and I felt calm and positive. This was helped by the incredible nurses, anaesthetist and surgeon that looked after me.  

After seven hours of waiting in a hospital bed it was suddenly time for my surgery. I never realised that I’d be walking down to theatre and it was the hardest walk of my life. Making myself walk through those doors and climb on to the theatre table, knowing what was about to happen, was terrifying so I was grateful that within two minutes I felt myself peacefully falling asleep under anaesthesia.

Just over three hours later I woke up in recovery and instantly felt relieved that it was over and that I could now say I would never get breast cancer. The surgery went as well as expected and both my skin and my nipples survived. I have been fitted with empty expanders so at the moment I am completely flat chested apart from swelling. Once I have fully recovered I can start the process of expansion and hopefully by the summer my breast reconstruction will be complete.  

There have been ups and downs through my recovery including pain, tears and frustration but it has been a lot easier than I ever expected it would be. Those friends and family that have supported me, looked after me and make me smile have been invaluable and I do feel incredibly proud to now be 13 days into my recovery.

I have good days and bad days, I’m making good progress, and the pain is manageable. I do occasionally get upset about things like the fact that none of my old clothes look nice and I don’t feel comfortable in anything that shows my mastectomy bra or my flat chest.

It’s hard being stuck indoors recovering and not enjoying a normal life. It feels very strange not working, driving or training but I’m trying to remain positive. As soon as I have recovered my life will get back to normal and I can enjoy it free from the risk of breast cancer.

If there is anyone reading my blog that wants more details on the surgery or recovery then please do not hesitate to get in touch.

With love Katie xx